Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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