but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
