the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
