We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Randomize
