Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize
