i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
