can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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