marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Randomize
