So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
