can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
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