I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
