I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
soo... how was my night?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize