I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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