The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize