AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
