About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I just had sex on a roof
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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