Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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