i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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