Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
