You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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