Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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