just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
is it fun? or sober?
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
