I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Randomize
