i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
