look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
