What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
