you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
My room smells like vodka and shame
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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