NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize