So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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