were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize