Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
