Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize