you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Randomize
