Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
