i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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