office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
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