your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
