is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Randomize
