my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
false alarm, still single
Randomize