so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
a search helicopter?!
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
