You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
