I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
vagina is talking i cant
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
