do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize
