do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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