Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
