R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
she told me i tasted like america
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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