THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
