Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
