do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
