Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
